The Impact of Society in “I Stand Here Ironing”
“I Stand Here Ironing” is the interior monologue of a mother struggling to identify where the responsibility resides for the troubled upbringing of her daughter, Emily. While the unknown character who asks to meet with the mother appears to believe that the mother plays a major role in understanding her daughter’s troubles, the reality is—and as the mother discovers through her inner conversation—that society and its pressures had a great impact on Emily. The mother clearly feels guilt for her daughter’s unhappiness in childhood; yet at the same time she recognizes her limited ability to raise Emily any other way because of the society’s restrictions. Olson implements her own frustrations towards society through exploiting the mother’s struggles while raising a baby on her own. Olson, as a result, criticizes numerous flaws in the society at that time. These imperfections include the unequal treatment of women, the lack of good childcare, the low pay for basic jobs, and the societal pressures to act, dress, and look a certain way.
Upon being asked to meet with an unknown person and give advice about her daughter, the mother reacts defensively and inwardly responds that even though she is her mother she does not “have a key” to the locked-away reasons for her troubled daughter (3). The mother notes that some of the sources which contributed to the development of Emily were beyond her ability to control when she comments, “There is all that life that has happened outside of me, beyond me” (2). Additionally, the mother mourns over the fact that financial difficulty while Emily was a little girl inhibited the mother from being able to provide her with the best childhood. She said, “We were poor and could not afford for her the soil of easy growth” (55). Because of the extreme difficulty in finding a job during this time period in addition to the low pay that was offered, the mother was forced to leave Emily with her father’s family. Emily’s experience at her father’s house, according to the mother, stripped her of some of her happiness and the mother noticed that “all the baby loveliness was gone” (11). Instead, Emily was “walking quick and nervous like her father” (11).
Olson expresses her criticism towards the poor childcare of this time by calling nursery schools “only parking places for children” (12). The mother realizes the negative impact of putting Emily in the nursery school when she knew it was not adequately meeting Emily’s needs at the age of two. The mother recounts how Emily would often come up with fake reasons to stay at home, away from the evil teachers. However, Emily never made an outright refusal to go. As the mother is remembering these events, she suddenly feels a pang of guilt and responsibility and asks herself, “What in me demanded that goodness in her? And what was the cost, the cost to her of such goodness?” (16).
From the very beginning of Emily’s youth, the mother noticed that society did not appreciate Emily’s unique physical appearance. When Emily was a baby, her mother told her she was beautiful; however, the mother recalled that those who noticed her beauty were “few or nonexistent” (5). Even as a child in school, society’s pressure wore Emily down; she worried about her thin, dark, foreign-looking appearance because according to society “every little girl was supposed to look…a chubby blond replica of Shirley Temple” (35). In a society where looking different was unappreciated, unique-looking Emily fell into the shadows. She never had best friends and at the convalescent home she stayed in, the community did not want her to get close with anyone there. As a result, Emily became removed from society because she did not fulfill the requirements to “fit in”.
In conclusion, because of the pressures in society, the young Emily struggled throughout her childhood. Olson exploits society’s flaws through making these imperfections be responsible for the insecurities and troubled feelings a child developed while growing up. Additionally, Olson shows that in spite of the pressures Emily experienced, to her mother, Emily is “more than [the] dress hanging on the ironing board” but rather she is a unique woman with an individual talent and a look of her own (56). (719 words)
What type of tone do you think the mother is talking in? Whiny, regretful, defensive?
Why do you think Olson chose to write the story through the mother’s thoughts?
Do you think the ending was positive or negative?
Do you think the mother could have done anything better? Or do you think she did the best she could do with what she had?
